“In any given moment, we have two options: to step forward into growth or step back into safety.” Abraham Maslow
The Purpose of Personal Growth
There is one thing we all have to agree on: we all naturally tend to escape muddy waters rather than learn how to dive through them.
Personal evolution starts with forgetting stereotypes: what doesn’t kill you makes you not necessarily stronger. The fact that a certain struggle lies behind doesn’t necessarily mean that you have grown from it — true growth only happens when awareness meets integration. It might as well make you fearful and avoidant and, most of all, controlling. On the other hand, facing yourself amid adversity, reframing your perspective and approach, and developing emotional intelligence makes you more resilient and better equipped to face and handle whatever comes your way in the future. In other words, it is a freedom to be your authentic self, to flow and create effortlessly instead of escaping and hiding, or dwelling on grudges, assumptions and fear.
It is how life works after all: as every wise teacher, it provides valuable lessons—it’s up to us whether we grow on them or use them as excuses. After all, there’s no guarantee that avoiding one struggle will keep us in the clear forever.
The Purpose of Struggle and Suffering
The theory is straightforward: every struggle is only as hard as you can handle it.
I might add: The way you see and approach it, is how you shape it for the next moment to arise.
Or in the words of the American cartoonist Charles Addams: “What is normal for the spider is chaos for the fly.”
Our own perception—the subjective experience—is what gives meaning to everything around us, including our challenges, whether it’s things, people, or situations. Each person experiences external occurrences through their personal ‘filters’ for reality. These are shaped by their understanding, emotional capacity, cultural and tribal conditioning, and personal system of values. Once these filters fall off, things can take on a new meaning—a countless number of them—which consequently offers just as many options to interact with them. Thus, the solution to a given problem can vary greatly depending not on the circumstances themselves, but on the person experiencing them and their capacities, starting with their perception.
Therefore, the perception that life becomes easier only by avoiding challenges—rather than understanding them and investing in our own growth through knowledge and conscious work—reveals everything about how we relate to our past trials: whether we have used them as assignments for evolution or chosen to carry them forward as suffering.
How Personal Change Starts
Transformation is an ongoing process that begins the moment you realize you want something better in life, even if you aren’t fully aware of it yet. The initiative to accomplish something, according to psychology, is either born by desire for pleasure—moving toward, or by pain—moving away from something.
Yet, either to leave or to arrive, we first need to understand: Why We Are The Way We Are.
Confronting and accepting Why I Am Where I Am—mentally, emotionally, circumstantially—is the formula of The Present Moment, and knowing this allows us to redefine the same in order to work toward both a certain outcome as well as a preferred quality in all aspects of life.
When You Begin to Work on Your Life
Personal change always starts with perspective: the way you are conditioned to evaluate and approach a situation shapes your entire experience of it. And when your perspective changes, so does your emotional capacity, your resilience, and your ability to respond. Accordingly, you are no longer a victim of your circumstances—you are the artist of your destiny.
Can you imagine the power of that, directing your life where you want it to go?
Suddenly, things don’t happen, you initiate them. You arise and conduct, instead of being pulled and pushed around. Remember, it is not just a decision—it is a whole journey of reinventing yourself, and certainly the one that takes you further than any other.
So, go inward. Explore yourself. Go as deep as you can, as far back as you can to get to know the structure, the values, the energy. Every insight reveals where you stand, allowing you to shape the path to where you are about to head.
Key tip: Before embarking on this journey: remember, be kind and patient with yourself. The truth is not necessarily easy to confront, yet it is the most powerful tool, what you need for clarity, and what will guide your transition to the next phase. Have in mind: some aspects emerge at once, the others reveal themselves through subsequent situations, experiences and states of being.
Helplessness is what you now leave behind, as knowing what has changed you in the past will make you never stop striving to leave the place you once were in.
Intention and Clarity: Reversing the Formula of the Self
Clarity is what we lack most when our minds are caught in the swirl of struggle, roaming to find a solution; yet it is necessary for shifting perspective, seeing beyond old patterns, and choosing a path that aligns with our choice.
Clarity comes from paying attention to what is happening right now. It begins with recognizing the patterns and truths that we are often blind to—not because they are distant or hidden, but because they are close, familiar, or filtered through interpretations that disguise their limiting or harmful effects. When we see a situation clearly, the same patterns often appear again and again in different forms, signaling the call of consciousness: to notice, intervene, and disrupt the cycle.
Oftentimes, these moments are calls to open more fully to the themes of the heart — to discover new meaning, guidance, and fresh perspectives within each challenge.
Intention is the initiation of everything. As mentioned earlier, either moving towards or away from a certain situation.
Vision or pain.
Both are legitimate motivations to leave the space you’re in: Clarity is the lens through which we observe our old Self, recognize the patterns that shaped our Now, and decide which ones we need to outgrow to achieve our Intention.
It is the quiet spark that says: “I want something different. I am ready for change.” And that is usually when it happens.
Think of it this way:
Intention sets the destination to arrive at, and Clarity is the space to flow through to get where you want to arrive.
And when you begin to align both through conscious action, you create the very foundation of transformation.
Transformation vs. Goal: Becoming, Not Just Achieving
A goal—call it a desire or a vision—presents a challenge in many ways. Regardless of what one strives to achieve, it involves a certain process: gathering information and knowledge, establishing routines and habits, forming connections, communicating, putting oneself out there, and making things happen. Simply put, it is the sacrifice of current comfort for a beneficial outcome.And whatever you build or benefit from making that sacrifice may bring certain changes, such as positioning in circles, increased self-confidence, acquired assets, health and well-being… Nevertheless, it doesn’t necessarily change who you are inside and how you experience, approach, and create in the long run.
Therefore, personal transformation isn’t just about achieving something you truly want. It’s about gaining sustainable knowledge, becoming someone you’ve never been before, embodying the values, awareness, routines, and qualities you want to bring into your experience, which enables you to create different, valuable outcomes for the future.
In both examples, more than the outcome, it’s the process that shapes you. It’s about identifying the small details that led to your current circumstances and making adjustments according to wherever you want to arrive.
Therefore, personal transformation is discovering the aspects of yourself that came together to create this moment: it is about understanding your inner experience and how it is reflected on the outside, not just about learning new skills or collecting knowledge; it is about spiritual expansion—seeing who you are now in order to reverse that formula—and connecting with a new version of yourself, letting go of outdated ways of being and experiencing life through fresh eyes. From there, you can consciously choose not only how to un-become what holds you back, but also how to reinvent yourself in order to bring your vision into your personal experience.
Awaken, Transform, Evolve
Become aware of how each of your traits and past experiences has led you to this moment.
Once you begin to see the pattern clearly, you start awakening to your own conditioning. You begin to notice when automatic reactions arise and realize you can take conscious control of the situation. This is the moment to ask yourself:
Who do I need to be in order to meet in reality what I truly want?
It is Clarity emerging: the call to make a different choice.
From here, you can set a clear Intention to guide your actions.
Now, imagine the reality you want to align with, and accordingly, the person you need to grow into: their values and attitudes, their behavior and thought patterns, their way of being. Hold that vision, adjust with every new insight and begin to live into it, step by step, day by day.
Transformation is rarely instant, but with honesty and persistence, it is inevitable. Every challenge holds the potential for self-transformation, if we approach it with curiosity instead of judgement, with intention instead of self-victimisation.
Each choice becomes an opportunity to shape your life consciously, moment by moment.
Connect with your breath and keep going.
These phases of life invite us to seek more than what has previously been offered.
They call us to open to deeper meaning, to gain insight through guidance, and to connect with like-minded souls on a similar journey. Whatever path you choose, follow the call — it may lead you through new challenges, misunderstandings, or confusion, yet you will never regret embracing it.
Only when we approach challenging situations as true potential for more can we master them as such and create a new outcome.
It is the power that is one of a kind: knowing yourself and transforming it into what you want to live.
How to Recognise the Shift in Personal Growth?
There is a simple rule for knowing when you have outgrown a part of yourself: seeing the purpose of what lies behind you determines your approach to what lies ahead.
Because, pain becomes a blessing when we approach it as a door to wisdom, and discomfort becomes the space to transform it into strength.
I know… we’re not saints— we almost naturally lean toward quick fixes. But true wisdom is not earned through shortcuts. It’s a process, a practice of seeing things from different angles, and of choosing, again and again, the perspective that brings freedom, at whatever cost required.So take your time. It is okay to feel angry about your powerlessness in the past. Grieve if you must, feel the weight of what once dimmed your light… but it’s not where you’re meant to stay. When you are ready, let intention and clarity show you the way.
Meet And Embrace Your Inner Power
I sincerely hope that you will use the insights, questions, and practices shared here to explore your inner world and step into the process. Remember, the truth may be shocking at first, but it may provide relief and turn out to be revolutionary if approached consciously.
Everything around will inevitably unfold.
Your journey is unique, but the principles of clarity, intention, and conscious transformation will serve you well every step of the way.
Stay magic, you’ve got this.